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Quanae`

The Start of Our Beginning

Updated: Mar 3, 2023

You know how stories usually have this great introduction of characters? Yea, this isn't that. I am Quanae` and my son is Adonis. The end.

My pregnancy and conception of Adonis was not a true love story. There wasn't a prince charming that swept me off my feet or even anything remotely close. It just happened. I was dealing with this guy , thou who shall not be named. I mean it was a nice lil vibe. (I got pregnant during covid, judge your momma not me.) It basically was a I did the doo and whoop de doo.(Don't tell my mom though. I got Adonis from Amazon Stork, that's my story and I'm sticking to it.😂😂) Anyways back to the story.

October 24,2020 I went to this kickback my little siter threw for her at the time boyfriend. It was fun, I cant even lie. So fun, I was still feeling the side effects of it Sunday night or so I thought. I mean stomach hurting, no appetite, nauseous, had a headache and tired as hell. Ladies, you know that's all a sign of your cycle coming. So the thought of me being pregnant didn't even cross my mind. I was on the phone with my best friend, fertile Martile, and jokingly she told me take a pregnancy test. (Mind you I only had tests cause she had gave them to me when she got pregnant.) At this point I'm like she taking my sickness as a joke and it was time to put her kids to bed anyway so we hung up. Yall why like a dummy I went took the test thinking I was gone prove her wrong. Gots to know I called her back in total disbelief. The test had to be wrong. I was making up all types of excuses. Even went as far as to googling if my depression medicine could cause false positives. (I was on fluoxetine at the time. It wasn't hitting on nothing for me and a complete waste of time taking it everyday.)


Well October 26, 2020, at 6:25 pm after three more home test and going to my local urgent care. It was confirmed. I was indeed pregnant. I was still in disbelief, but I started making life changes fairly quickly. By month three I was already wearing my seatbelt a bit looser so if I got in an accident, it wasn't tight on my stomach. By month four I stopped laying on my back unless for an appointment and I only slept on my sides. I guess you can say I was overly cautious. To say it was my first pregnancy I was very skeptical it would last. So much so I didn't tell my mother until I was nine or ten weeks. I didn't announce to family and friends until my second trimester. Maybe in the back of my head I always knew something was going to be wrong. There's this prayer I use to say in the morning and before bed that I still say to this day.

Thank you, God, for giving me the ability to create and carry life. Thank you for my son and for making me his mom.

Every appointment I would ask for an ultrasound because I was just so scared one day I would go, and I wouldn't have a baby anymore. This sick feeling, I had probably was a mixture of my own self-doubt, but also perinatal depression. I refused to talk about it though, everyone around me was so happy. I just kept it to myself.

As I got further along in my pregnancy, I noticed changes. My blood pressure would be elevated often. I started having Braxton hicks at roughly 4 1/2 months. And By month five or six I was officially monitoring my blood pressure at home, as I showed signs of preeclampsia. Month six I was diagnosed with gestational diabetes. I didn't just notice things with me though. In the womb, Adonis wasn't an active child. At times I could go a whole day without feeling him move. It was so bad I ended up getting a fetal doppler from my big sister. By the time we did anatomy scan at 20 weeks or a little bit after is when he started measuring a bit bigger than average. By twenty-eight weeks, which is the time fetus heart rate should be slowing to about 140 ish beats per minute his was still averaging 160s or higher. My doctor wasn't worried though, so I tried not to.

Along with the high heart rate Adonis had a few spots of fluid buildup that was being monitored (his stomach, head and another part of his body i cant recall). This condition is called Hydrops fetalis. I was being followed by a specialty doctor for this. She couldn't say exactly how much fluid it was from ultrasounds, but that at that moment it wasn't cause for too much concern as he was still developing properly, and I had already stated i would not terminate pregnancy.

I've known since I was a child that if I ever had a kid there was a fifty percent chance of it having hemophilia or being a carrier. (My father is a severe hemophiliac, and I am a carrier.) The lingering thought of that always played in the back of my mind. Especially, since I knew all too well the struggles that come with it. So, there I was a soon to be mother battling my pregnancy related issues while constantly worrying about the what ifs. Then we got hit with one condition that would have never crossed my mind.

Can you guess what came next? I know I wouldn't if I didn't experience it.


SN: It's kind of funny now, well not really, but I actually let a previous obgyn of mine convince me I wasn't a carrier. Thats a story all on its own though because she was just incompetent. And I was a fool.


Like I said before I`m not an English professor but I will come back to review and change grammar errors. Until next post, Write yall later...


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